Christmas Eve celebrated with Beach Metro News’ cartoonist Bill Suddick’s The Night Before Christmas (Sort Of)

Welcome to Dec. 24, 2025 — Christmas Eve!

As has become an annual tradition here at Beach Metro Community News on Christmas Eve, we’d like to share our long-time cartoonist Bill Suddick’s take on the famous poem A Visit from St. Nicholas (otherwise know as ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas).

Now Bill’s version has a decidedly Beach-twist to it, and that’s why we like to share it with our readers every Dec. 24.

Bill first started drawing cartoons for our paper in March of 1981 when we were called the Ward 9 News. Since then he has been a stalwart member of the Beach community, and even published a book of cartoons about the area.

An interesting fact is that A Visit from St. Nicholas was first published anonymously in the community newspaper of Troy, New York, on Dec. 23, 1823. Thirteen years later, Clement Moore took credit for the poem though some say it may have been written by Henry Livingston.

So, 202 years after A Visit from St. Nicholas was first brought to the world in the pages of a community newspaper, we here at Beach Metro Community News invite you to enjoy Bill Suddick’s The Night Before Christmas (Sort Of).

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS (SORT OF)

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the beach,

Not a creature was stirring, not even a leech;

The hockey socks were hung from the renovations with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The raccoons were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of garbage bags danced in their heads;

And the wife with her Spritzer an’ me with scotch,

Had just settled back to watch the Leafs botch.

When out on the street there arose such a clatter,

I leaped from the couch and nearly emptied my bladder;

To the stained glass window I flew like a gull,

And beheld a strange scene over which I did mull!

What to my wondering eyes should appear,

But Santa, on a streetcar, and 8 hulking reindeer!

“Get offa’ my lawn!” I yelled at the deer,

“It’s bad enough with the DOGS around here!”

All donning Nikes, his coursers, they came,

And he whistled, and shouted and called them by name:

Now Jogger! Now Balmy! Now Beacher and Rugby!

On Malvern, on Hamper! On Yoga and Yuppy!

And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,

The pawing and prancing of…a guy from the ‘Goof?’

“You’re at the wrong address!” I said with a roar,

“Deliver that Soo guy and Wonton next door!”

As I drew in my head and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound;

On his back was a sack filled up with neat stuff;

For the folks in the beach it was more than enough!

He had cat-toys for kitties, and acorns for squirrels,

Sail-boards and sports cars for boys and for girls;

He looked up at me and asked what I wanted;

I said “a Porsche!”… He looked undaunted:

With a wink, he reached into his bundle so heavy;

“Sorry…the best I can do is a ’68 Chevy!”

I laughed at his joke, he chuckled at mine;

I offered a beer but he had to decline;

“Thanks my friend, but I’m driving tonight!”

I heard him exclaim as he sped out of sight.

He headed down Queen St. and banked to the right,

Shouting: “MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!!”

Season’s Greetings…

Bill Suddick